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Twin Flames



 

TWIN FLAMES






Social media is full of stuff like this. 


I want to discuss about how the pain inflicted caused me to do intense shadow work, which has helped me to overcome childhood traumas that our relationship highlighted, and now I am so much stronger than ever before. 


I want to thank her as a healer and apologise to her for having to take time out, and the language I had to use to do that. I know it was not perfect for her that I did that either but it was not perfect for me that she dragged me through pain and caused me to need to heal. 


The thing is, as Karl Jung explains, when we do the shadow-work, we heal and are stronger for it. I recognise this aspect of our relationship. I am sorry for any hurt I caused her, obviously I never want to hurt her. But I am not running from accountability. I know it would be easy to describe it as abuse and to obey the social pressure of 'narcissism awareness paradigm' which social media is being used to promote as a form of social engineering, brainwashing us all by telling us how we should think and exploiting our suffering and anxiety to cause us to reject the targeted person as a narcissist. Its not the full story. 


The full story is how twenty years of on-off counselling and therapy did sweet nothing to heal my lifelong trauma cycles, and a few months of being put through shit after the honeymoon phase had ended has sorted me out, has fixed deep core wounds, and that only happened because of how difficult it was being with her at times when the stress of life got too much for us to handle and we took it to on each other, took each other for granted, assuming we would always have each other as a forever person, stable relationship and that our love can withstand infinite testing to destruction instead of protecting it and making it grow indestructible. 


Who I am today is someone who recognises social promotion of the 'persecute and avoid the narcissist' story for what it is: non-accountability for healing and using the narc as a catalyst to heal inner wounds. 


I can only love her more deeply for having fixed me that way, because I chose to do the soul-work. I know she is angry with me at the moment, for rejecting her. If she has done the shadow-work too she will be stronger now than before too. 


I never believed in this 'twin flame' dynamic she was talking about, until experiencing it. Yes its intense and yes it hurts. We get burned playing with fire. Cauterising old wounds requires that. And we do heal - more than ever expected to heal. 


This is maturity. From here, analysing the Cult of Narc Awareness for what it is - avoidance of healing by blowing off pressure into the community, and how that has become a culture with its own internal language - and it has become a playing failed for narcissists to exploit the vulnerable. 


Go deeper into the pain and shadow. It gets you so much further. 


It's not so much about whether I want her back. Of course I do. I've had to accept, as a part of healing, that should we never meet again, I'm okay with that now too. Because my inner core is more solid than it has ever been. That is thanks to her.  


She's done this to other guys too. And broken a few along the way while practising, and she's been broken by a few in turn. Such is life. Catalysing guys toward fixing themselves fully is her role in the community. I value that because I believe in community, in people. I will protect her as far as I'm able. As far as she will let me. 


From her part; the expectancy that she will work with me too, for mutual empowerment. That's my boundary. It is one lesson I hope she learns from the experience of our having been together.


How you get over it is you do the shadow-work. You go into the pain and you process it by being honest and taking accountability for your healing. You revisit the trauma and you understand what it did to you, how your survival mechanism at the time has taken over to become your operating system. That you can close the wound and free yourself from operating from a system based on pain. 


By loving yourself more than you love anyone else and by forgiving and loving the person who hurt you. By being grateful to them for providing you the focus to do this shadow-work. 


Thats how you get over it.



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